So my sister and I are being good Messianic Christians and trying to celebrate Hanukah with our overly expensive and hip menorah. It went alright; last night I read aloud from a book titled something like, "A Prophetic Calendar: The Feasts of Israel," about how God-followers of today and times past celebrated this holiday. Even Jesus celebrated Hanukah, so I felt cool.

Then the cat was feeling really good about Hanukah, too, so good, in fact, that he got too close to the glory and caught his tail on fire. It smelled really bad.